Why would an all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-good God allow there to be pain and suffering? Today’s psalm tells us that our God is all-knowing when it says; “to his wisdom there is no limit.” This psalm tells us that our God is all-powerful when it says, “great is our Lord, mighty in power.” The psalm also tells us that our God is all-good when it says, “praise the Lord, for he is good.” Well, if an all-knowing God exists, surely God knows about our pain and suffering. If God knows about this pain and God is all-powerful, surely God is capable of doing something about pain. If God is capable of doing something about pain and is all-good, surely God would take away all pain and suffering. Since there is still pain and suffering, it may leave us wondering if an all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-good God even exists?
Not only does an all-knowing, all-powerful, and all-good God exist, but we hear in today’s Gospel reading that this God who we call Jesus came and did take away the pain and suffering of Peter’s mother-in-law and many of the others who were sick and possessed by demons. Well, that’s all well and good for Peter’s mother-in-law and the rest of those who were healed. But what about the rest of us who are left experiencing pain and suffering? What about us?
In today’s first reading, we hear Job give voice to our lament. Job says, “Is not man’s life on earth a drudgery?” Job continues by saying he cannot go to sleep at night, that he will never be happy again, and that he has no hope. What we see with Job is that pain and suffering can either be the biggest obstacle to faith or pain and suffering can be the biggest invitation to having an even greater faith. Maybe what Jesus wants to heal most in us is the part of our lives that is most in need of healing. To experience this healing, we must move beyond simply praying for the removal of pain as our sole goal for our relationship with God.
For those of us like Job who are in the midst of experiencing pain and suffering and who may be feeling abandoned, punished, and hopeless, maybe the part of our lives that God knows is most in need of healing is the identity crisis we are experiencing. Jesus knows our hearts and when we have given into the temptation of viewing our identity as someone who is abandoned by God, someone who God does not listen to, or when we think of ourselves as someone who is punished by God for doing something wrong. When this is the way we think, it is our image of God and of ourselves that is in desperate need of healing.
I once heard a Franciscan priest tell this story. He said, “I was at home one evening when I heard the doorbell ring. When I opened the door, there was a woman there who was about 35 years old. She said, “I was given your name by a friend and I was wondering if” and she started to cry. She said “my Daddy’s at home dying of cancer. I don’t think he has long to live. Could you come pray with him?” I said, “of course, I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”
I arrived at the home and I walk back to the bedroom where her father was lying in bed with an empty chair sitting next to the bed. I said, “hi, it looks like you were expecting me.” He said, “no, who are you?” I said, “honest mistake, I saw the empty chair, I thought you were expecting company.” The man said, “oh, yeah, the chair, do you mind closing the door?” I close the door and the guy says to me, “I’ve never told anybody this in my whole life, not even my daughter, but all my life I’ve never known how to pray. I go to church on Sunday my pastor talks about prayer and it goes right over my head. One day, after Mass, I gathered up the courage and went up to the pastor and said, “I get zero out of your sermons on prayer.” The pastor grabbed a book handed it to me and said, “here, read this. It’s written by Hans Urs von Balthasar. It’s one of the best books on prayer of the 20th century.” “I took the book home, read the first three pages and had to look up 11 words in the dictionary. Next Sunday, I give the book back to my pastor saying, “thank you very much; under my breath, for nothing.”
So, I abandoned any attempt at praying until one day four years ago, my best friend who I don’t think of as very spiritual, out of nowhere says to me out of the blue “you want to know how to pray, it’s a simple matter of having a conversation with Jesus. You put an empty chair in front of you and in faith see Jesus in the chair and then you just speak to him and listen as you would in a conversation with your best friend.”
The man said, “I’ve been doing that two hours a day now for the last four years. I love to do this. I’m careful because I don’t want my daughter to see me talking to an empty chair and send me to the funny farm. Do you think this is prayer?” I said, “I think that is so simple, so unsophisticated, so open, so honest, and so real that it delights the heart of Jesus.” I then anoint him and prayer with him and go back to my house.
Two nights later, his daughter returns to tell me that her Daddy passed away that afternoon. I asked “did he seem to die in peace?” She said, “yes, when I left to go to the store at 2 p.m., he called me over to his bedside and kissed me on the cheek. When I got back from the store after 3 p.m., I found him dead. But it’s strange, beyond strange, at the moment my Daddy died, he leaned over and laid his head on an empty chair beside his bed.”
Do you know this Jesus? Do you know this unconditional friend of ours who holds us in his hands when we need him most? Is this the way you related to him? The pain and suffering we experience in life is meant to be an invitation to greater closeness with Jesus and trust in God’s will. Jesus knows the pain and suffering we face from having experienced it first-hand on the cross. Jesus experienced great pain and suffering in this life and yet we know he did nothing wrong. Then, why do so many of us think the pain and suffering we experience is simply punishment for something we did wrong?
Before he was arrested, beaten, and hung on the cross, Jesus knew well the pain and suffering that lay in front of him and he prayed to God the Father saying, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me yet, not as I will, but as you will.” All too often, we pray just the first part of this prayer when we ask God to remove the pain and suffering from our lives, but Jesus wants us to also pray the second part of this prayer along with him, “not as I will, but as you will.”
Later in the passion narrative, we encounter Simon of Cyrene who, as far as we know, also did nothing wrong, but yet he experienced pain and suffering because he was close to Jesus. When the pain, suffering, and weight of the cross were too much for Jesus to bear alone, Simon of Cyrene helped Jesus in carrying his cross. Simon of Cyrene experienced the pain and suffering of carrying the weight of Jesus’ cross along with Jesus.
Just as soldiers who go to battle together forge a bond with each other in adversity that is deeper and stronger than the relationships they have with anyone else, the same is meant to be true for those of us who have the honor of experiencing the pain and suffering of the cross with Jesus. Maybe Jesus heals us by removing our pain and suffering, but maybe he doesn’t. Maybe instead Jesus is inviting us to go even further with the cross than Simon of Cyrene did and along the way grow into an even deeper relationship with Jesus.
The only thing worse than experiencing pain and suffering, is experiencing pain and suffering all alone. Imagine with me the moment when Jesus is hanging on the cross from the perspective of the side of the cross. Jesus is hanging on one side of the cross experiencing indescribable pain and suffering and there you are hanging on the other side of the cross along with Jesus. Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, though occurring in the past to us, is nevertheless, always present to God, because God does not exist in time as we do. At this Mass today, Jesus’ unique sacrifice is made real and present to us here and now, because it is a divine reality that transcends space and time. When we are tempted to feel all alone in our pain and suffering, the reality is Jesus is with us and we are also with him so he does not feel all alone in the pain and suffering he experiences.
Saint Teresa of Calcutta said, “Pain and suffering have come into your life, but remember pain, sorrow, suffering are but the kiss of Jesus – a sign that you have come so close to him that he can kiss you.” In the middle of our pain and suffering, our all-knowing God knows our pain from the perspective of having crawled inside our pain with us. Our all-powerful God stands up in the middle of our pain and like a powerlifter, pushes up the weight of the pain away from us with his mighty hand to keep it from crushing us. Our all-good God cares for us by holding us in his comforting hand and gives us a caring kiss when we need it most.
So, as we unite our pain and suffering to his cross and as we open our lips in a few moments to experience Jesus’ real presence in the Eucharist, let us experience this kiss. And let this kiss remind us, that being a follower of Jesus involves lots of pain, but always more grace.
5th Sunday in Ordinary Time Cycle B – February 7, 2021
Mass Readings:
Reading 1: Jb 7:1-4, 6-7
Psalm: Ps 147:1-2, 3-4, 5-6
Reading 2: 1 Cor 9:16-19, 22-23
Gospel: Mk 1:29-39